I don't know much about my grandparents relationship at the beginning. I just know what it was like to witness it and hear about it in the short amount of time I had with them. You didn't have to know the history to know that my Grandpa loved Nana with all his heart, or that Nana fully trusted Grandpa and felt safe with him.
I've always felt, or maybe just hoped, that my relationship with Aaron is like my grandparents relationship. The were married for 50 years before my grandpa died. He was holding on to life to make sure they got that 50 years together. From my perception, Nana had quite a bit of spunk for such a little woman! Kinda reminds me of someone, though she was far more petite than I am, and I'm sure Aaron wouldn't call me "spunky" exactly... Grandpa always struck me as being so strong and faithful.
When I picture Aaron and I after 50 years of marriage I can't help but see my grandparents. I don't know if it's because that's what we are, or just what I want us to be. I want our love for each other to be obvious in the little things. I know that the only way that can happen is if we push through any fights, or worldly ideas of what marriage is or should be.
My family's told Aaron that Grandpa would have liked him. I think that's because they are alike in some ways. I only wish Grandpa had gotten to meet Aaron. I wish he could have seen that I'm happy with a good man and amazing kids. Grandpa died when I was 15. I wish before he went home that I spent more time with him. I was too busy being a "cool" teenager that I missed the last few years of his life. He and I were always so close and I missed an opportunity to get to know him better.
I didn't make the same mistake with Nana. I tried as often as I could to see her, of course I still wish it had been more. She died in October 2007. I have a picture of her holding my sweet baby Braeden when he was only a few weeks old. I'm so glad she got to meet him. I wish she could have met Reesey. I'm sure she'd have been just as much a sucker for those dark brown eyes like the rest of the world.
The hardest part about my Nana passing was that she, knowing how close I was to my Grandpa, never felt she measured up. I wish I'd have made more effort to tell her I loved her just as much, and that though Grandpa and I were close, she and I had an amazing relationship. I loved getting to talk to her as an adult and hear her take on life and hear her advice to me. Maybe it was those conversations that gave me a great look into my grandparents love and marriage. So yes, I do hope I can not only be loved like that, but love like that.
Aaron, bear with me when I'm being, well, "spunky" to nicely put it. You are my strong and ever faithful husband. We'll see our 50 years and Jesus, whichever comes first. I love you.
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